Watching
by Witknee
Summary: Because there is no comfort in the waiting room, just nervous pacing waiting for bad news." Peyton/Brooke centric.
1. Chapter 1

Watching

Disclaimer: These characters are not mine. The CW and their affiliates solely hold the rights to this little world that we call "One Tree Hill".

Spoilers: Right up to 6X24, the season finale. Touches of Julian, kind of spans the whole Brooke/ Peyton friendship dynamic and has mentions of

Lucas/ Peyton/ Brooke- and the birth of Sawyer. Quasi based off of the Death Cab for Cutie song "What Sarah Said". I highly recommend that you

listen to it- it's quite lovely.

Timeline: 3 years after the finale. Sawyer is three and a half-ish.

Synopsis: "Love is watching someone die."... So the question is who's going to watch you, Brooke Davis?

It's been three years since you left the town that you've called home your whole life and set out in to the great unknown with your husband andyour beautiful child. Three years since you threw caution to the wind (although, if you're honest with yourself, that's never been too uncommon foryou), and took your child away to explore and live and just be. Your burgeoning little family, escaping the town that held both heartache andtremendous joy. You've been all across the country, every which way, and have finally settled into a suburb of Tucson, just so your little girl canfinally have some place to call home, so you can put down some roots for once and just live your lives like you've wanted to for so long. You husbandis off on another book tour. He calls every night, spending an hour on the phone with you and if she's still awake, another undetermined amount of time on the phone with his little girl, just listening to her babble, helping him to drown the loneliness that comes from being on the road.

You have been back to Tree Hill a couple of times- once for your best friend's wedding to- ironically- one of your ex-boyfriend's, and another handfulfor reunion- type events. You told yourself whenever you left that your child would not grow up not knowing the people that loved her- and you-most. And true to her words, Brooke spoiled the child rotten and always stole her away when she had the chance.

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Brooke hadn't been her first word, no, but it was a close second, and when the word had come out of Sawyer's mouth on a Sunday afternoon whilethey had been visiting, the look of joy that had come upon her surrogate aunt's face was something that you still to this day hold as one of your favorite moments with your best friend. It was then, while holding your little girl in her arms, that she had announced she was pregnant. She neverlooked you in the eyes when she said it, just kept staring at your child, stroking ashy blonde hair, until you whispered her name joyfully. The lookshe gave you _then_ would go down as your favorite look that the brunette had ever offered you. Tears were gathered in her eyes, the rasp in hervoice thick, and her smile illuminated the room. It was quiet until you squealed, jumped out of the seat you were crouched in, and enveloped her in abone-crushing hug. Your little girl started squealing as well as she became wedged in between two energized bodies, and you pulled away quickly,taking her in your arms and shushing as she cried. You chuckled to yourself, sneaking another glance at the girl you'd relied on, for, well, forever,and met her eyes. You smile again, the words still resounding in your head, and felt something begin to build in your chest. Pride, you'd decided, andoverwhelmingly, love. You tell her you love her, grab her hand and squeeze. Tears still thick in her eyes, she does the same, until she lets go of your hand to reach both of them out to take the still-crying child into her arms. She looks at you, and you smile warmly.

"I've gotten all I've ever wanted," you'd said, repeating the words you'd said to her three years earlier, "What about you, Brooke Davis? What aboutyour dreams?"

You watched as the first tear fell, the smile still touching her lips as she spoke.

"I've gotten all I've ever wanted, P. Sawyer. I have the dream." She shrugged her shoulders playfully, " Who would've thought that your leftovers would've made me so happy?"

You'd laughed outright at that, remembering back to years ago when the brunette had walked up to you with a Styrofoam container and thrusted it into your confused hands..

You shook your head, had let out another bark of laughter, and then met her eyes.

"Remind me to bring you a take-out box next time, kay, Davis? Repay the favor?"

She'd nodded affectionately, clutched the baby to her chest, and simply reveled as the cries had died down to occasional whimpers as she fell to sleep in the other girl's arms.

"You're going to be an amazing mother, Brooke Davis." You'd said, pride coloring every aspect of your tone.

She'd met your eyes again, simply nodding and clutching your hand once again, in thanks at your kind and sincere words.

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When your cell phone rings just after mid-day, as you're barreling down the six-lane freeway, you don't even look at the caller I.D. to see who it is,just simply pick it up, assuming it to be work-related or your still-traveling husband. You glance in the rearview to look at your daughter, babblinghappily in her car seat, playing with her dolls, and echo your greeting when the person on the other end fails to speak. Your ears perk when youhear heavy breathing on the other end, a shuddering breath. When the man speaks, it takes you a second to realize that it's Julian before you hearhis sentence come out in a blur of words. The words 'Brooke' and 'hospital' reach your ears and you're already pulling the car into a u-turn on thehighway, heading for the airport. You barely hear his shaky voice explain what's going on, your mind already focused on the task at hand- getting a plane to North Carolina as quickly as possible- and without meaning to, snap that you'll be there within the evening before you end the phone call.

Shock has already settled upon you as you dial your husband to tell him what is going on, calmly. He asks you if you're okay to drive right now andyou cut the bitter laughter short, and simply answer in affirmation. He tells you he'll meet you in your childhood home and though you're completelyfocused on rushing to your best friend's side, you shakily tell him thank you and let him tell you he loves you before you shut off the phone completely so you can make it to the airport without breaking down completely.

//

And that's part one, ladies and gents. It's going to be a multi chap--- I already have a couple more written that will be published shortly. Please leave feedback- this is my first OTH story and I'd definitely like to know what you think of it. Thanks!


	2. Chapter 2

"Watching"

You get to the airport in record time, make it to the nearest terminal and start asking a slew of questions about boarding times and connector flights to a frightened flight attendant. She steers you in the right direction, though, and within the hour you're on a non-stop flight to Raleigh. You thank God for the thought that you'd had the day before when you put a box of Fruit Smiles in your diaper bag, and entertain your daughter with the books you've stowed away with them as well. It's only when she falls asleep on your lap that you allow your mind to process what is going on, why you're on the plane to being with, and how you're actually going to get to Tree Hill when you won't be touching down for another five hours and you don't have any mode of transportation. You pull out your phone, sending a quick text (even though you know you're not even supposed to have it on- but it's an emergency, damn it) to you father who you know is state side this month- thank God. He texts you back, saying he'll meet you there. You don't tell him what it is about because there's not enough text space in your message and you really don't want to talk about it, but you try to let him know how urgent it is that he be there on time. Message received, you allow yourself to nod off during some point during the flight, your arms unconsciously tightening around your daughter as she snuggles in your chest.

When you close your eyes, however, your head becomes completely wrapped around your best friend- the one you will be seeing a in a few short hours. Within moments of nodding off, your mind is in Tree Hill- you've all of a sudden appeared at the Pier that you and Brooke used to frequent when you both went out on her parent's boat. You begin to take steps toward the place you remember the boat being docked and look down at yourself. You're wearing the clothes that you were currently traveling in- and you knew that this had to be a dream, that you couldn't possibly be in Tree Hill- where was your daughter if this were real, after all? You're incredibly self aware within this realm of dreams, you realize, and though you're beyond confused, you continue to walk toward the familiar area of the pier. And that's where you find her, where you knew you'd find her.

She's just as beautiful as you remember- all tan skin and dark hair- it's longer than you remember it being since the last time you visited. She's sitting with her legs hanging off the pier, her eyes fixed to her lap, her hands stroking over something almost reverently. She doesn't comment as you approach, just continues staring down at the object of her affection. It's not until you are standing directly over her shoulder and are peering down at it that you realize that it's a child- a newborn laid out on its back, squirming and squinting, one little fist balled up, the other wrapped tightly around your best friend's fingers. A little boy dressed in a yellow onezie with turtles dancing down his left side. He has a shock of dark hair and bright blue eyes and he's absolutely beautiful- you have the sudden urge to protect him above all else. You stand there for a few moments and just stare at the child, taking him in. Just as the silence becomes too much and you're about to say something, she beats you to it.

"Bout time you got here," she says jokingly, her eyes never leaving the child in her arms, "I was wondering when you were going to get here to meet your nephew, Sawyer."

At that she finally turns to look at you and there's something different about the way that she looks at you. She has tears in her eyes, but that's not what's different- you've seen her break down multiple times. No… it's something else, you muse. Your eyebrows crinkle as you attempt to place the look. It takes you a few moments but you finally realize that the look she is sending you is full of love. You've seen her shoot you a version of the look before, yes- but this… This takes your breath away, leaves you warm and brings tears to your eyes. This is the look of unabashed, unmovable and unconditional love- the love a mother for a child. She looks at you for a moment longer and then moves her eyes back to the baby- _her_ baby- and stokes her free hand down his soft face. When she speaks again, you've somehow moved to her left side and seated yourself in the same manner as she is on the pier.

"This," she says, moving the child into your eager arms, "is Davis Peyton Baker." She stops to look you in the eye, smiling as your eyes flit over the child squirming in your arms.

"Sorry to steal your formula, Peyt, but it works. Just feel lucky that your name is bisexual-"

You shoot her an incredulous look and she laughs.

"Or gender-neutral, whatever." You laugh at that, gathering the child closer to you. He looks at you dead in the eye and you can almost see his brow furrow as he tries to place you, tries to figure you out. You ghost your finger over his cheek in the same manner as the girl sitting next to you just did and try to choke back the tears forming in your eyes.

They clog your throat, though, and when you speak his name, your voice catches. You unconsciously play with the baby's hair and lean your body into the girl sitting next you. She sighs, wraps an arm around you and you find that you are happy, at peace in this moment- more at peace than you can remember being in a very long time. This time, however, it is you who breaks the silence.

"You did it, Brooke." You whisper, eyes still locked on the child in your arms, "He's beautiful. You've finally made all your dreams come true, B. Davis. How does it feel?"

There is silence until you feel the sobs begin. When you do, you pull back in alarm, tearing your eyes away from the baby at last. You ask her what's wrong and she buries her head in her hands as she cries in earnest. When she speaks, you balk at the sadness overwhelming her voice.

"Oh, Peyton," she whispers, "I… I'm so afraid that I'm never going to see you or him ever again."

Your brow crinkles in confusion and suddenly your arms are empty. She's taken the baby back from you, tears still falling from her eyes.

"Brooke… I don't understand… what's the matter?"

When you turn to look at her this time, though, she's not the Brooke you've seen every time since you were five. This Brooke is bloody and bruised and broken- her face littered with lacerations, her eyes puffy and barely open. You find yourself wracking your brain… what the hell had happened to her? Julian hadn't gone into detail but you'd just assumed…You simply stare on, transfixed, unable to look away. The baby stays in her arms, though, content and happy and unfazed. She looks at you one more time, grief evident in her eyes as your throat catches in a scream. You catch one more sentence that comes streaming out of her mouth before you're ripped from her side.

"You have to wake up, Peyt," she rasps out, "You have be here. I can't do this without you."

You wake with a loud gasp, the images in your head consuming your thoughts for a moment after you wake until your daughter's face comes into view. She snuggles into your chest at the movement and sighs but is otherwise unaffected. You unconsciously hold her closer to you and then look at your phone. Only another thirty minutes before you're supposed to land. You can do thirty minutes. You stare out the window of the plane, the images of your best friend broken and bloody seared into your memory. You bite the tears back and tell yourself it was only a dream, that you don't know what's going on- it could be nothing, that you'll get back home and she'll be fine… But after the dream you've had, your head and your gut just won't shut up and fear and anxiety are quickly racing up your spine, wrapping your body in a cold, numbing chill.

But still, you take a deep breath and reason- she was pregnant, things always seem worse when there's a medical situation and the woman's pregnant. You sigh and feel the

seconds tick by, hoping to God that your father shows up on time so you can go home and be by her side where you belong. You want… need to know that she's okay. Because she has

to be, there's really no other option.

//

Voila! Part Dos! Please review, let me know what you think. It's about to get kind of dark and twisty here, folks.


	3. Chapter 3

Two packages of Fruit Smiles and a bathroom break later- which was really, really fun with a toddler- and you're in Raleigh. Your father meets you by the gate and asks you where your luggage is. You simply shake your head, put your daughter on your hip, and walk as quickly as you can, your father barely trailing you. You bark out at him to hurry up and he does. When you get to his truck, he looks at you with worry and confusion. On the two hour ride back home, in which you make your father switch with you so you can drive- you explain what is going on. He doesn't ask many questions- simply nods in understanding. You can almost hear the wheels churning in his head as he muses. Brooke's in trouble, he must be thinking, so your behavior makes a hell of a lot of sense.

You pull into Tree Hill in record time, surprised at the very least that you didn't get a speeding ticket. But you know that that still wouldn't have deterred you from driving like a bat at out of hell. You suddenly hear her voice in your head, making some snarky comment about how you conduct yourself when driving, and you close your eyes, simultaneously smirking and fighting back the siege of tears that threatens to overtake you.

A right at the stoplight, a left at the local grocer, and then a straight shot gets you to Tree Hill Memorial. You park the truck, badly, and look at your daughter, sleeping comfortably in the arms of your father. You touch her cheek lightly and then look at your father imploringly. He nods his head, moves his hand in a flitting motion, silently telling you to go. He'll meet you in there.

From there, it's a dead sprint until you get in the doors, hit the receptionist's desk, and breathe out her name. The receptionist barely gets a word out edgewise before you hear a voice call out your name, and you turn, seeing the other girl you grew close to all those years ago. As she rushes you, her face already crumpling in grief, you barely register that you're moving and meeting her halfway, your voice already choked in a half- sob. Your arms become a tangled mess as you wrap them so tightly around the other girl that you're sure she can't breathe. When the tears threaten to fall because you know that if Haley James Scott is on the verge of breaking down it can't be good, you pull away and look her in the face, asking her what has happened, the extent of the damage, basically begging for any semblance of an answer to how badly your fiend has been injured.

Haley's head droops for a moment and you can almost see the thoughts flitting around in her head. She sighs as she brings her face back to meet yours, the tears holding steady in her eyes. A deep breath is taken, by which of you you don't know, and the story comes spilling out of her lips. There was an accident- Brooke had been driving, it was slick outside from the recent snow (you vaguely remember the slickness of the road- the trip didn't even register in your head anymore, though) and she had lost control of the vehicle. A one vehicle accident- she had hit a tree head on. It was on the outskirts of town, she had been returning from some sort of business meeting, and had been knocked unconscious upon impact. A car hadn't come by for twenty minutes, upon which the ambulance had been called. Within those twenty minutes, she had lost a lot of blood, the baby had been put in distress, and her body was exhausted and damaged from trying to keep the woman and her unborn child alive.

The tears spring to your eyes and you shakingly ask the woman in front of you if the baby is alright, your head flashing to the child you had seen in your dream on the flight over. For the first time since your arrival, Haley's face lights up with a ghost of a smile as she nods.

"He's doing just fine," she soothes, her hand reaching out to smooth over your arm, "Delivered by C- section about two hours ago. Six pounds, seven ounces." Her voice becomes strained, suddenly, a tear finally dropping onto her cheek, "God, Peyton, he's so beautiful. He's the spitting image of her, dimples and all."

Your throat constricts then but you gulp down the sob that threatens to overtake you. You smile tightly, breathing out your relief at the news. Now that the child is out of harm's way, your thoughts move back to the woman you're there to see.

"And Brooke?" You ask, desperation clear in your tone, "When is she going to wake up- what's the prognosis- come on, Hey… I just…" You look down, fiddle your hands as a cover to catch your breath and calm your pounding heart, and then look back to her once more, "I need to know that she's going to be okay."

There is silence for a moment as she simply looks back at you. It's only a moment but you swear to God that the stretch seems like minutes, hours, as your heart continues to pound in your chest. When Haley's voice hitches with her next words, you can feel the organ drop down into your stomach, dread pooling down with it. Her tears are constant now, and you can vaguely feel tears on your fingers as you wipe them away. You can also hear your own voice beginning to crack as you beg her to just tell her it's going to be okay… but it all doesn't register. You idly muse that maybe you've gone into shock.

"Peyton," she hitches, "It's not good… the doctor, uh, she thinks that she…"

Haley took a moment to collect herself before continuing.

"Her heart stopped, she stopped breathing… and they're afraid that she went too long without oxygen. It's a miracle that the baby even…"

Your stronghold breaks then and you can now feel the wetness on your fingers but you're no longer wiping Haley's tears off of her face. No, your hands are currently cradling your head as tears seep through your eyes. When Haley whispers your name with a heavy tinge of sadness, you realize that you're crumpled on the floor. Your knees have given out- and you're the one that is making those God-awful hitching sounds. You sound like you're dying- but your mind in that moment cruelly reminds you that you are the one that is very much alive- your best friend is the person fighting for her life at the moment.

Warm arms engulf you-someone joins you on the floor- Haley, and she cries with you, her head laid on top of yours as you pour out your fear into her chest. You spend a few more moments that way before a male voice sounds in the room and Haley's all of a sudden pulling you up with her so you can go over to her husband who's been watching the display with tears coloring his own eyes. You don't know how you move the fifteen or so feet over to meet him but you make it and his arms engulf you much the same way that his wife's did. He whispers something that you don't manage to hear and then releases you.

You mumble something in response and then wipe your nose on the back of your sleeve, grimacing even as you do. Words fall out of your mouth quickly when you realize that you're wasting precious time grieving for her when you could be seeing her.

"Can I see her, Haley? I have to see her…" The tears color your voice but you refuse to let them overtake you once again.

She shakes her head sadly and explains that she's still in surgery, that they'll know something in a while and at that admission, you feel yourself unceremoniously plopping down in a conveniently placed chair, spent and desperate and hopeless at the situation.

Nathan's voice sounds in your head then as he sits down beside you, answering some of the questions that are on your mind but unable to ask at the moment. He explains that Julian is on the way back from L.A. on a Redeye- he had gotten the call and then passed it on to Peyton and then Haley and Nathan. Nathan goes on to say that Julian had simply been out of town for an overnight visit to tie up the loose ends of a production when the accident had occurred and had been in a panic. He should be arriving in a few hours. After the bit of information, your head drops and you nod numbly. A few more minutes pass by in tense silence- you can feel their stares on you- Nathan's hand is running soothing circles on your back. You say nothing, don't move, and only look up when Haley says the best thing that you've heard since you had arrived.

She shuffles to you nervously, sits on the other side of you, and asks you a question that gives you the first feeling of hope since you've been in Tree Hill.

"But Peyton, if you want, the baby's in the nursery… We haven't been able to do anything except for look at him through the window but maybe… he's already been named, Julian took care of that over the phone- and you've been named as the godmother… I'm sure…"

The words are barely out of her mouth before you're on your feet already heading to the nursery, desperate to see the child of your best friend, desperate to hold and guard the child with everything you have.


End file.
